I have a boy friend who grew up with me. I used to call him “Loggy” (coz’ he is like a log, always lack in expression). Remember the day he proposed for me to be his girl friend was on 14th February, sending me a doll with Valentine’s card. Today, I went to his house to celebrate this special 14th February 2008 day with him again. (^_^ )
However, due to his “WOODY” nature, we always argue/fight with each other.
Me : “Loggy, do you want to watch movie?”
Loggy: “I can’t”
Me: “Why ? You have something to do?”
Loggy: “No, I am just going to meet a friend.”
And then comes the fighting part. He is always like this. He even met with girls in front of me like it was nothing wrong. Sometimes this make me sad and angry, probably to him, I was just another “Girl Species Friend”, the word “LOVE” never came out from his mouth, he only said “LIKE LIKE LIKE”.
To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all. He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days, 200 days and so on. Everyday, before we said goodbye, he will hand me a doll without fail. I don’t know why and amazingly none of the doll is the same. One day…….
Me: “Uh…….Loggy, I……”
Loggy: “What? If you want to say something, Just say it?”
Me: “I want to ask you something?”
Loggy: “What? Say lah”
Me: “Do you love me?”
Loggy:“Um……Just take this doll and then go home.”
Me: “Why do you always ignore this question?”
Loggy: “No, I am not. I give you a doll everyday, don’t I?”
Me: “Why do you give me a doll everyday?”
Loggy: “Stop asking so many nonsense questions, take the doll and go home now, it is late…”
The dolls I received from him everyday filled my room, one by one, there are so many and he never answered my question………... Then one day came, my 20th Birthday, it was a Sunday. I got up early in the morning, dressed myself, pictured a great time with him and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But……….Lunch passed, dinner passed, supper passed, he still didn’t call. All I get was hours of tired waiting and dialing at his engaged phone until I felt asleep. Then at 3am morning, he suddenly calls me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Even though upset and furious, I still felt a bit of joy as I am about to see him, so, I went out quietly…………
Me : (staring at him with my angry face)
Loggy : “Here……take this…..” (he handed me another doll)
Me : “What is this?”
Loggy : “I did not give it to you yesterday, so, I am giving you now. I am going home now, bye….”
Me : “Loggy, Wait. Do you know what day is today?”
Loggy : “Huh? Today?”
Me : (I was so sad and angry, how can he forget my birthday? I want to find out where he went today) “Where are you today?”
Loggy: “I went to Belalong with some friends. Bah, it is cold out here, go on in, and don’t stand there.”
However, due to his “WOODY” nature, we always argue/fight with each other.
Me : “Loggy, do you want to watch movie?”
Loggy: “I can’t”
Me: “Why ? You have something to do?”
Loggy: “No, I am just going to meet a friend.”
And then comes the fighting part. He is always like this. He even met with girls in front of me like it was nothing wrong. Sometimes this make me sad and angry, probably to him, I was just another “Girl Species Friend”, the word “LOVE” never came out from his mouth, he only said “LIKE LIKE LIKE”.
To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all. He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days, 200 days and so on. Everyday, before we said goodbye, he will hand me a doll without fail. I don’t know why and amazingly none of the doll is the same. One day…….
Me: “Uh…….Loggy, I……”
Loggy: “What? If you want to say something, Just say it?”
Me: “I want to ask you something?”
Loggy: “What? Say lah”
Me: “Do you love me?”
Loggy:
Me: “Why do you always ignore this question?”
Loggy: “No, I am not. I give you a doll everyday, don’t I?”
Me: “Why do you give me a doll everyday?”
Loggy: “Stop asking so many nonsense questions, take the doll and go home now, it is late…”
The dolls I received from him everyday filled my room, one by one, there are so many and he never answered my question………... Then one day came, my 20th Birthday, it was a Sunday. I got up early in the morning, dressed myself, pictured a great time with him and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But……….Lunch passed, dinner passed, supper passed, he still didn’t call. All I get was hours of tired waiting and dialing at his engaged phone until I felt asleep. Then at 3am morning, he suddenly calls me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Even though upset and furious, I still felt a bit of joy as I am about to see him, so, I went out quietly…………
Me : (staring at him with my angry face)
Loggy : “Here……take this…..” (he handed me another doll)
Me : “What is this?”
Loggy : “I did not give it to you yesterday, so, I am giving you now. I am going home now, bye….”
Me : “Loggy, Wait. Do you know what day is today?”
Loggy : “Huh? Today?”
Me : (I was so sad and angry, how can he forget my birthday? I want to find out where he went today) “Where are you today?”
Loggy: “I went to Belalong with some friends. Bah, it is cold out here, go on in, and don’t stand there.”
After saying this, he just turned around, entered his car and wanted to leave. Immediately I shouted back……
Me : “LOGGY”
Loggy : “You have something to say?”
Me : “I want to ask you one final time, DO YOU LOVE ME OR NOT?”
Loggy : “What?”
Me : “You heard my question, now answer it?”
Loggy : (Sigh)
This is what he said and then drove off from my house. My legs were stiff, face wet and I walked back into the room, crying endlessly on my bed. Since then, for two weeks, neither did he call me nor went out with me. Routinely, he keeps on dropping by, passing a doll everyday to my maid outside my house and drove off. Now, there were more dolls in my room, piling up like stack of books…..
One day, when I went shopping with my parents, I saw him with a girl, smiling and chatting happily with that girl. He was in the dolls department, buying a doll.
In a fit of anger, once I got home, I grab a black garbage bag and packed all the dolls he gave me inside. While dumping the dolls into the black bag, my cell-phone rang, it was him. He asks me to meet him at one of the jungle trekking route near my house. (We used to go jungle trekking together there) I calm myself down, keep reminding myself that the purpose of me going to meet him is to bring an end to our relationship. I want all this to settle soon, once and for all.
Going up a steep hill on the jungle trekking route, his figure came into my sight, holding a hug doll.
With his wide smiling face, Loggy said “Wow, I thought you are angry and will not come, but you came too.”
Me : (I really hate him, acting like nothing happen) “So, what is up?”
And as usual, he held out the doll for me and said “This is for you.”
Me : “I don’t want it”
Loggy : “What? Why?” (pushing the doll at me)
Me : (Angrily, I grabbed the doll and threw it down the steep hilly road I climb up just now) “I said I don’t want it, I don’t need it anymore and I don’t want to see you anymore too…………..”
I spilled out all the swearing, sadness and hurtful words inside me. Unlike other days, I saw his eyes become wet too.
Loggy : “I am sorry…..” (He apologized in a tiny voice and moved towards the doll, wanting to pick the doll up at the foot of the hill.)
Me : “Aiyah………, I don’t want the doll anymore, don’t pick it anymore, Just let it be….”
Just like usual, he ignored me and went to pick the doll. Suddenly, I heard a tweak from the branch and I saw Loggy falling off and rolling down the hill. I saw his head knock against a big rock along the way. My heart pumping, hand trembling, eyes wet, I shouted out his name, “ LOGGY, LOGGY, How are you? LOGGY, Look at me………”
This is how he left me. He left without giving me a chance to apologize what I had said to him earlier. Since then, I had been locking myself up in my room, getting by every day with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him.
One day, my mother handed me the big doll Loggy wanted to gave me on his last day. I took the dolls and put it on my bed, there are still blood-stained on the doll. Loggy blood…….
Looking at the garbage plastic bags, I went over to take out the dolls. Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. Memories of him fill my mind, my eyes were full of tears, I began to count the number of dolls that I had, it represents the number of days we were in love.
Counting slowly, “One, two, three, four, five, ………………………..four hundred and sixty-three.” It all ends with 463 dolls, ie, the last huge big doll. Again I started to cry, hugging tightly the big doll in my arms. Unexpectedly…………..Loggy sound came out from the doll, it said “I Love You, I Love You”
Surprised, Stunned and Shocked, I dropped the doll, I mumbled to myself “I……Lllll….ooooovvveeeee……You?”
I picked up the big doll I dropped earlier and pressed its stomach, Loggy said “I Love You, I Love You”. Cannot believed what I have heard, I began pressing all the dolls stomach as it piled up on the side and Loggy words came out non-stop……..
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
Again I pressed on the stomach of the big doll a few times, and this time a letter fell out from the doll (teddy bear) shirt, it reads
Hai,
Do you know what day is today?
We have loved each other for 463 days. Do you know what 463 is?
I know you are angry with me.
Most of the time I was too shy to …….Ummm……to say I Love You. Therefore, I gave you a doll every day, helping me to pass the message to you.
However, if you forgive me and willing to take this doll, I promise I will say “I LOVE YOU” to you everyday every hour every minute and every second.
And one more thing, 463 = Love deeply You. I really Love You and Please don’t leave me.
Loggy
Loggy : “I am sorry…..” (He apologized in a tiny voice and moved towards the doll, wanting to pick the doll up at the foot of the hill.)
Me : “Aiyah………, I don’t want the doll anymore, don’t pick it anymore, Just let it be….”
Just like usual, he ignored me and went to pick the doll. Suddenly, I heard a tweak from the branch and I saw Loggy falling off and rolling down the hill. I saw his head knock against a big rock along the way. My heart pumping, hand trembling, eyes wet, I shouted out his name, “ LOGGY, LOGGY, How are you? LOGGY, Look at me………”
This is how he left me. He left without giving me a chance to apologize what I had said to him earlier. Since then, I had been locking myself up in my room, getting by every day with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him.
One day, my mother handed me the big doll Loggy wanted to gave me on his last day. I took the dolls and put it on my bed, there are still blood-stained on the doll. Loggy blood…….
Looking at the garbage plastic bags, I went over to take out the dolls. Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. Memories of him fill my mind, my eyes were full of tears, I began to count the number of dolls that I had, it represents the number of days we were in love.
Counting slowly, “One, two, three, four, five, ………………………..four hundred and sixty-three.” It all ends with 463 dolls, ie, the last huge big doll. Again I started to cry, hugging tightly the big doll in my arms. Unexpectedly…………..Loggy sound came out from the doll, it said “I Love You, I Love You”
Surprised, Stunned and Shocked, I dropped the doll, I mumbled to myself “I……Lllll….ooooovvveeeee……You?”
I picked up the big doll I dropped earlier and pressed its stomach, Loggy said “I Love You, I Love You”. Cannot believed what I have heard, I began pressing all the dolls stomach as it piled up on the side and Loggy words came out non-stop……..
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
“I Love You”
Again I pressed on the stomach of the big doll a few times, and this time a letter fell out from the doll (teddy bear) shirt, it reads
Hai,
Do you know what day is today?
We have loved each other for 463 days. Do you know what 463 is?
I know you are angry with me.
Most of the time I was too shy to …….Ummm……to say I Love You. Therefore, I gave you a doll every day, helping me to pass the message to you.
However, if you forgive me and willing to take this doll, I promise I will say “I LOVE YOU” to you everyday every hour every minute and every second.
And one more thing, 463 = Love deeply You. I really Love You and Please don’t leave me.
Loggy
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